Fuelling the Flames
by KiaraSkye
Summary: Requested by Shiranai Atsune: Series Rewrite with Male!Mikasa x Fem!Eren x Levi. Story follows the anime with some creative twists. ;)
1. Chapter 1 : Titans' Attack

**A/N** **: Hello guys! I know... I shouldn't be writing a whole new story when I haven't completed my other one. BUT** **I got an awesome request from Shiranai Atsune to make this story. I honestly couldn't wait to start it... Hehe ^.^ Thank you for the request!**

 **Story Description: Rewrite of Shingeki no Kyojin (Attack on Titan) as a female Eren (Erena: Pronouned like Eren-ah) and a male Mikasa (Makasu). The dynamic will be similar but not exactly the same as the series.**

 **Hope you guys enjoy!**

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 **Chapter 1**

 **Titans' Attack**

In one single moment, everything changed. The smiling faces and the laughter that had once surrounded us was washed away in an instance of unimaginable terror. In that horrible moment, we knew in our hearts that home was a giant pen and humanity was cattle.

 _I smiled as I watched with excitement as the Survey Corps march in front of us. It had been my dream to become part of their team. To explore beyond the border. I was no longer content with the fact that we were trapped in a cage like animals. I wasn't going to wait to be eaten by the monster on the other side of the wall. I wanted to change that. I wanted to help liberate us from the walls._

 _Even as I watched the broken bodies of the men that walked before us. I was still very keen on being part of all of it. It was still an easy choice. I remembered always being underestimated because I was a girl. I hated that. I had to show all of them that I wasn't just some weak girl._

 _I heard some men talk trash about the Survey Corps. I had narrowed my eyes at them and impulsively hit one of them with a stick I was carrying on my back for fire. Of course, Makasa had dragged me away before I could even start arguing with them. He always seemed to butt in when I didn't want him to._

" _So. Are you still bound and determined to become one of them? The Scouts?" he asked me as he dragged me by my arm towards our house. I widened my eyes as I looked up towards him. He was staring down at me with those same dark eyes. I bit my lip and looked back down after pulling my arm away from his hand. I knew if I said yes that he would try to talk me out of it._

 _Makasu always seemed to know how to get under my skin. He knew just how much I hated people underestimating me yet he did just that. It wasn't like I hated him or anything. I was just frustrated that he didn't let me do anything on my own. I didn't need a babysitter._

 _I could still feel his eyes on me, "What?"_

 _He shifted his head, which meant he was now looking forward again, "Nothing. I just don't want anything to happen to you."_

 _I felt my cheeks flushed at his words._ Cool it. He is your brother, _I scolded myself. Not that I had any of those feelings for him anyways. Yuck. But my cheeks flushed anyways much to my dismay. "Whatever. Like anything will happen to me. You are stuck with me." I joked with a huff. I shouldn't have been shocked when he told my parents that I wanted to join. The jerk._

My seemingly pleasant life had been shattered with screams that echoed throughout the area. Itwas enough to wake us, to make our frozen bodies move into action. But my mind wasn't thinking about escaping from the monsters that threatened to eat us alive. No. I was thinking about my mother who was still at our house. My body moved, rushing towards the house not thinking about my two friends that I had been chatting idly with just a few minutes ago. Getting my mother to safety was what got me moving. I couldn't just leave her there.

 _It will still be standing. She will be there and we can all get out together,_ I told myself over and over again in my mind. I was picturing my home still intact with my mother smiling but of course when I rounded the corner my house had been crumpled to the ground. My heart dropped at the sight of it. "Mother!" I yelled as I pushed my legs even faster. _Damnit, don't cry!_ I scolded myself. It wasn't the time or place to cry. I needed to see my mother safe.

"Erena!" I heard her call out as I came closer. I took a sharp intake of breath, seeing her crossed under the roof that had caved in. My body trembled but it kept moving to try to get the rubble off her body. I had been so caught up in my mission to save my mother that I hadn't noticed Makasu following behind me and now trying to help me save her. "Erena, sweetheart. Please, run."

"I can't!" I yelled, trying to my hardest to move the damn thing off. "I won't. Makasu, help me." I was pleading but I already knew that he was doing his best as well to get her out.

"I'm trying," he let out, "It's too heavy."

I felt the ground beneath us shaking, as the sound of giant feet stomping made it to my ears. I chanced a glance to my side to see the Titans moving. This just felt so unreal. Was this really truly happening? Why now?

"Erena, listen to me. Even if you got me out, my legs are crushed. I cannot run," she tried her own pleading. My heart felt like it would stop from her words. I grinded my teeth, trying harder to get the rubble off. I wouldn't give up on my mother. I would find a way. I couldn't just leave her here to die. To be eaten… by those damn things. "Erana, would you listen to me for once? Take Makasu and just run!" I continued to reject her idea. "Makasu, take her away." I could tell from the corner of my eye that he sent a glance my way as I continued to struggled.

"No. I can't do that," he said to her, struggling along with me. If it weren't for the fact that we were in a life or death situation, I would have probably smiled. But this wasn't one of those days. My mother was in a terrible situation.

"You want all three of us to die?" she questioned us just as we heard a line from the Anti-Titan gear, or vertical maneuver gear, come closer. "Hannes!" My mom called called to the useless drunkard guard. "Take the children and get them out."

I bit down on my cheek to stop myself from saying anything, continuing to push myself further. I had to get her out and the sooner the better. I wasn't about to let this old man take me away from my mother. No way would I let my mom be killed this way.

"Come on, Carla. That's not our only option," he responded to her, surprising me a little. "Hey, I'm a trained soldier. My skill set is killing Titans and saving lives." He rushed away to attack some of the Titans closest to us.

"No! Don't do this! Please!" My mother yelled after him.

His bravery at that moment had caught me so off guard. So off guard that when he had cowardly back tracked to take me and Makasu that I didn't even have time to fight.

"No! What are you doing, you bastard!?" I yelled on his shoulder as he was carrying us away in a run. "WAIT!" I stretched out my arm to try to reach my mother but it was a childish thought. Of course it was all for nothing. Hannes kept running us further and further away from my mother. The chance of me ever saving her was decreasing every second. "We can't just leave her!" I kept yelling and struggling in his arms. I was trying my hardest not to cry as I was carried away from her.

"I LOVE YOU! YOU HEAR ME!?" I heard her yelling, causing me to stop for a second to listen to her words. "STAY ALIVE!" I kept my wide eyes on her as I lost the will to yell anymore. I just felt so pathetic. I was so weak and useless. I watched in horror as a Titan reached her.

"STOP IT! NO!" I screamed with everything I had as if the dumb monster would even listen to my cries. I watched in anguish as he broke her body and ate her. My mind went blank as my body went numb with the shock of what I had just witnessed before me eyes.

And just like that… Everything changed… In that horrible moment, we knew…. In our hearts, that home was a giant pen. And humanity… cattle.

To Be Continued

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A/N: Well guys. I hope you enjoyed the first chapter. Favourite, Follow, Review. :)


	2. Chapter 2 : Wrath

**A/N: Merry Christmas/Happy Holidays, Everyone! Here is the second chapter for now. Hope you all enjoy!**

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 **Chapter 2**

 **Wrath**

 _Our house is gone,_ I thought as I sunk deeper in my dark thoughts. _Forever. Why was I always such a brat? Why couldn't I have listened to her more? Why didn't I tell her I loved her?_ My regrets kept piling up more and more.

I felt the shock start to numb me to my core. I wasn't crying anymore as I sat on the wooden boat to ride off to a safer place. Safe? As if anywhere was really safe. It had all been an illusion that could break at any given time. It was easily broken in just an instant with the massive Titan. Where had it come from? Why now? None of this made any sense but it was my reality.

I just stared off into space, hugging my legs up to my body. Could this have been all some kind of nightmare? I had been getting a lot of them for a while now. But as much as I wanted to believe it, I knew that this wasn't a dream.

" _Your mom died because I'm a damn coward!"_ Those words from Hannes still echoed in my mind from earlier, when he had been dragging Makasu and I away from my mother. I had thrown a tantrum only for him to say those words. I couldn't find it in my heart to be mad at him. But at the same time, I was angry that nothing had been done to prevent this. Everyone had been so easily put in a false sense of security. People had been complacent about their ways. Why pride yourself when you lived in a cage? People made me sick. If only we had been more prepared instead of being so content with being behind walls. I couldn't do anything because I was a kid. A small little girl who couldn't stand up to a Titan. But next time I'd be ready.

I wasn't aware of the concerned glances I would get from Makasu. I was too lost into my own shock stricken mind to bother with my surroundings. Only when another Titan broke through Wall Maria did I snap back into reality again. When you thought things couldn't get any worse, they did.

My teeth clenched, hands tightly gripping on my shirt. On that day, I vowed that I would kill every single one of those damn things. Every single fucking one. They had invaded our home. Devoured my mother. And treated us as if we were cattle to be slaughtered at their will. No. I wouldn't stand for that. I didn't care if it meant walking a road towards certain death. I would gladly take it. I couldn't just sit on the sidelines. I wouldn't just sit around waiting until they finished us off. I would fight and take a stand.

 _I will kill them all,_ I vowed even deeper in my soul as my hatred for them continued to grow deep inside me. Something was clawing its way inside of me. Wrath.

"Erena," I heard Makasu's voice call out my name from beside me, effectively snapping me out of my thoughts.

"Yeah?" I let out, not really wanting to hear what he had to say. I had too much on my mind, and a weight on my heart to care. After a few minutes of no reply, I lifted my head up to look at him. He was watching me with what seemed like an emotionless expression, much like he always had on, but I knew that he was showing some concern for me. This made my frown even more, "I'm not some broken doll you need to worry about every single minute." I turned my head back in front, "I can take care of myself too." Even as I said those words, deep inside I knew that I wanted him by my side. I was just too stubborn to admit it. "I'm plenty strong." I was going to point out that I am not crying anymore. But truth was, I was still deeply in pain. I had just turned it around to hate. Hate for the Titans. And that was what kept me going.

"I know," he let out. I let my forehead fall on my knees after letting out a loud sigh. "But you can still lean on me when you need to." My eyes widened in my arms as my cheeks heated up at his words. I was thankful that I had already been in a position where he couldn't see me. And not like it was even time for that.

 _Why am I blushing anyways?!_ I yelled in my head. _Gah! He is such an annoying jerk!_ I kept repeating that like a mantra. Annoying because he always butted in. A jerk for making me feel weak all the time. He was just _Makasu_.

"Like hell. I can stand on my own just fine," I protested in my arms. I lifted my head up to glare in front of me. "Just because I am a girl-"

"It has nothing to with you being a girl," he cut me off. I looked at him as he shrugged. "But start thinking with that head. Or you'll only get into trouble." I frowned and decided to do the most childish thing I could do at that moment. I stuck out my tongue at him. But of course this only caused his lips to quirk up for a second. The jerk was having fun with me.

"Ugh. Just leave me alone," I let out as I went back to putting my head in my arms. I still had a lot to think about. He wouldn't distract me from my mission: **Kill. Them. All**. **Every last one.**

" _You have to remember the key, Erena!" I heard my father say to me. "It's the only way for you to find the truth. Don't you forget."_

My eyes snapped open as I heard the sound of church bells ringing in the distance. Was that all a dream? But it had felt so real. What had father done to me? What about a key? I found it so strange as I tried to shake the sleep from my eyes and calm my breath from that awful dream.

"Hey," I heard Makasu's voice from behind me. I turned my head to see him sitting near me. "You were just dreaming. It's okay."

I frowned at his words, "But it felt so real though…"

"Nightmare. Shake it off," he said to me as if giving me advice.

I just had no energy to fight with him, "Yeah." I took a deep breath to calm myself. I shouldn't let it get to me. There was more important things to worry about. But the sight of the key around my chest… Was it really a dream?

"Come on," Makasu said as he stood up. "They are handing out food rations near the warehouse. Deciding the go with him, I hid the key in my shirt and stood up to follow.

"I think this used to be where they stored all the dried good," he informed me. I wasn't really paying all that attention. That dream still had my mind all fuzzy.

"Hey guys!" I heard my best friend, Armin, call out to us as he ran with some bread in his arms. "Grandpa got us a little extra." He smiled at us as he handed us the food. Still dazed, I sent him a smile and a thank you.

That was when I overheard some loudmouth talk some crap about feeding us to the Titans. I was already on the move to go confront those bastards but Makasu had already grabbed onto my arm to drag me away.

"What the hell?" I let out as I pulled away from his grip. "Didn't you hear what those bastards said? Someone has to-"

He cut me off, "No. Just leave it."

I narrowed my eyes, "I can't just do that! What they said wasn't right!"

I could tell that his eyes had narrowed a bit as well, "That doesn't mean you should meddle. Leave it."

My hands tightened into fists at my sides, head down. One hand gripping on to the bread. "I won't be a coward. I refuse."

"I'm not asking you to be. Pick your fights," he said. "Use your brain."

I lifted my head up to glare at him, "I'm not an idiot."

"Guys!" Armin called out. "Can we please just stop fighting?" He turned to me with concern, "We just don't want to see you get hurt, Erena."

I looked down again, "I don't think I can do this." I paused, " I'm going to go back to Wall Maria. The Titans have to pay for what they did." I finally let out what had been on my mind.

"You can't be serious," Armin said to me. "You must be hungry."

"It has nothing to do with being hungry!" I yelled back. "Wake up! Nothing will change if the only ones protecting us are guys with just a bunch of talk!" I looked down at the bread in my hand and tossed it back to Armin. "The hell with them all!"

"You are only going to starve," he protested back.

"We can't depend on their charity. We need to stand on our own two feet. Don't you get it?" I kept on.

"I know that I used to say that our future was behind those walls but now that I have seen one. We will only get ourselves killed!"

"So that's it?" I said to him. I couldn't believe that he was going to give up so easily. "Runaway? Live off of someone's charity?"

"What else can we do?!"

"Leave!" I yelled back in anger and frustration. "If you are okay with living off of cowards. Fine. But I'm not a parasite!-" My next words were cut off by a slap at the back of my head. It hadn't been that hard but hard enough to shut me up. I glared at Makasu who had hit me.

"Makasu," Armin said his name.

"We're all parasites. The sooner you learn that the better," he told us as if it were the only truth. I looked down to the ground. "We won't survive without help. Tell me differently. Don't take it out on your friend." I frowned at his words. "Your mom didn't ask us to be brave. She asked us to live." My heart ached at the mention of my mother. I heard him moving towards me. In my vision was the bread I had thrown back to Armin. "Eat it. She asked us to stay alive. I won't let her down." I looked up as I felt tears threaten to fall down my cheeks. I gingerly took the bread and started to munch on it. I felt him pat my head as I kept on eating and didn't say another word.

 _I'm sorry, mom._

"We have to find a way to stop them," I told my friends as Armin cried over his grandfather. "Our lives will never be our own until we do. This world will never feel like home." I sat myself beside my crying friend, "I've made my decision. Next year, I'm going to apply to join the Cadets. I'm going to fight." I heard Makasu sigh as if he knew it was coming. "I will become strong."

"I'm with you," Armin added with me to my surprise.

"You don't have to-" I rushed.

"I do!" he said with such conviction that I lost my words.

"So will I," Makasu added on as well, crossing his arms.

"Damnit. I'm not trying to drag you in!" I let out. I didn't want them to join because I was. "Look, there's no point falling me to my death," I said to him, trying to argue for him not to go. I didn't want him to sacrifice his life because of my decisions.

"Yeah," he said, "And if I can help it then it won't be your death." I stared at him for a second. He always seemed to follow me. I looked down, making my choice.

"Alright. Together then." That was the day we made a promise to apply for the Cadets the following year. I was only step closer to my goal. I would spend the year to build up my strength. I wasn't going to head in unprepared. I _was_ going to become stronger. And nothing could stop me.


	3. Chapter 3 : Overcoming

**A/N: Hey guys! It's been a little while. I've wanted to finish this a while ago but I'm really sick. I decided to post this chapter but it's only half of what I had planned. I'll have the other half of this chapter done and another chapter once i don't feel so sick. Sorry if this chapter isn't as great.**

 **Reviewer Responses:**

 **Shiranai Atsune: I'm so happy that you are enjoying it so far :)**

 **animemangaobsessed : I hope I don't disappoint .**

 **Enjoy!**

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 **Chapter 3**

 **Overcoming**

I kept my eyes forward, back straight and my hands clasped behind my back as I stayed completely still. My mind was lost in thought about how much I had waited for this day. I was finally a new recruit. Making me one step closer to my goal. I was going to become strong and kill every last one of the Titans. I was so lost in my own mind that I wasn't aware of Instructor Shadis going around to the others. It didn't matter to me who everyone else was or why they were there. I wasn't here to make friends anyways.

"To join the Military Police, Sir," I heard a boy answer the Instructor. I couldn't help but be disgusted with how cowardly that was. He had no right to be there. All this guy wanted was a cushioned existence. He didn't know anything about the monsters behind the walls.

 _Tch. Pathetic,_ I thought.

But I had to admit that Potato Girl was the most surprising of all. She definitely took the cake over all. Not that I had been listening to everyone here but this had been unexpected. I would have laughed if it weren't for the fact that I took being here very seriously. There was a spark in me that had been annoyed and angry at her for not taking this as seriously as it should have been. It served her right to be punished the way she did.

"Man, I thought that Instructor Shadis was going to kill Potato Girl," one of the boys said from my left. Armin and I had decided to take some air outside only to be joined by a few others. Of course, the topic had turned to Potato Girl. I couldn't help but watch her from a distance. I had to admit that she had potential when it came to stamina. Though, her gluttony was going to get her into more trouble.

The others continued to talk about her and how much she loved her food. That was when I noticed a carriage leaving the growns, "What's that?"

"It's the dropouts," the only other girl with us answered. I had still not made an effort to know anyone's name.

Amin spoke up, "But it's only been a day." I couldn't believe that they would just leave without even really making an effort. But at the same time, if you weren't cutout for this it was best to leave now rather than later.

"They prefer to work in the fields," she added with a shrug of her shoulders.

"That's just the way it is. If you can't handle the pressure, you gotta leave," I said as I looked towards the sunset. I felt their eyes on me. "I can't believe anyone would rather pull weeds than fight."

The boy with the frickles stood up straight, facing towards me, "I know about some of us. But you never said where you were from, Erena."

I placed a hand on Armin's shoulder, "The same place as Armin. From Shinganshina." My answer was met with wide, frightened eyes.

"Oh, wow… That means," the boy with the freckles trailed off. Leaving the boy with the short haircut to take over.

"You saw it. You were there that day. You saw the Colossal Titan, didn't you?"

"Quiet!"

"Did you see him?"

I didn't know what to feel at that moment but I let words slip from my lips, "Yeah. Yeah, I did." Not knowing that my honesty would get me the wrong kind of attention.

It was finally time to eat our dinner. I was happily eating until some of the others came at my table to ask me questions about the Colossal Titan. It wasn't exactly the attention I wanted. But I also understood their curiosity. I might have been in their shoes if it had been someone else who saw it.

Finally getting tired of their pestering, I said, "Yeah, okay. I saw the big guy." A chorus of surprised gasps was heard throughout the room. I had to keep myself from sighing. What else did they expect?

"Seriously?" one of them asked.

I narrowed my eyes, _No. I just like telling false stories about it for kicks. Idiot._

"Exactly how tall was he?" another one asked. That was much less a stupid question.

"He stuck his head over the outer wall," was my answer. I tried to continue to eat as the others kept asking me questions. Mostly about all the rumours they had heard about it. "Huh. He was big but not that big," I let out as if it were nothing. No matter how big the bastard was, I was going to kill it. It really didn't matter to me. I answered another question on how it looked like, "It had a mouth like a corpse. It had no skin, just muscles."

"And the Armoured type? The one who broke through Wall Maria?"

 _Armoured type?_ "Is that what they are calling it?" I asked. I shrugged, "In all the panic, it was just another Titan to me."

"No way! So, what were they like?" another boy asked me as I was about to take another spoonful of my meal.

The flashbacks of the day my mother had been devoured by one came back to my mind. I let go of my spoon as a hit of nausea shocked my system. I held my stomach with one hand while the other was at my mouth. For that one moment, I was sick with disgust and grief again. But soon enough my anger was built back up again. The Titans would pay. There was silence in the room as I regained my composure.

"Come on. No more questions, alright?" said the boy with the freckles. "I'm sure she doesn't want to relive everything she went through."

The shaved headed boy added, "Sorry. We didn't mean to-"

I cut him off. I had regained myself again. The sick feeling was gone and my anger was all I felt. "It's not like that," I informed them as I took a bite of my bread. "Those stupid Titans. They aren't even that big of a deal. If we focus on mastering the Vertical Maneuvering Gear they give us, then it's Titan pay back time." I paused, "I waited years to be trained as a soldier. All of a sudden the reality is sinking in." I declared, "I'm joining the Survey Corps. Then I'm sending the Titan's back to hell. I'm going to kill them all."

"Are you crazy or something?" I heard a boy sitting down a few tables away from me ask. "Not that it's any of my business but signing up for that is a death sentence."

I narrowed my eyes at the boy. I recognised him from his declaration to become a Military Police. A coward like him had no right to lecture me. "I guess we'll see," I said. "Or at least I will." I turned my body in his direction, "You seem content with being a coward. Hiding in the interior."

He didn't even make so much of a single reaction,, "I'm just speaking honestly here, little girl. I just think it's better than being a loudmouth bragger, tough girl wannabe pretending she's not afraid when she is just as scared as the rest of us." This guy pissed me off! Who gave him the right to look down on me for being a girl?

I stood up in a rush, "Are you trying to pick a fight?" I was seething from his words. I would show him just how strong I really was.

The bastard had the balls to smirk at me as he stood up, "What's a little girl going to do?" My fist were clenched as I was getting ready to punch the smug asshole in the mouth! But then he turned his smirk in a smile after a few seconds as we all heard the bell ringing in the distance. "I'm sorry," he said, causing me to relax in confusion. What was wrong with this guy? "I didn't mean to make fun of your career choice." He raised his hand for a handshake.

I just glared down at his hand, slapped it away and half-assed my apology, "Yeah. Right. Sorry aswell."

"Erena," I heard Makasu call my name as I was walking out of the room. I turned around to wait for him to catch him. "You shouldn't be going around talking like that."

"Would you lay off?" I said to him in a huff.

"You should think things through. Running head first into something without thinking about it can get yourself killed," he lectured me as always.

I rolled my eyes and sighed, "Urgh. Again with this?" His constant worry over me never stopped. It was getting me irritated. When will I be able to show him that I can take care of myself? I needed to pass tomorrow's test. No matter what. I would prove to Makasu that I was a capable young woman that didn't need his constant protection. I would make him see me as his equal. But I didn't foresee the difficulty of tomorrow's test. Could I really be a soldier?

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A/N: Hope you all enjoyed! See you when I get better! :)


	4. Chapter 4 : The Test

**A/N: Hey guys! Sorry for the long wait. I had been really sick for a while there. But I am still alive. Thank you all for the Favs, follows and reviews! It made me so happy coming back and seeing all that. I hope you all enjoy this next chapter. I am sorry if anyone is OOC.**

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 **Chapter 4**

 **The Test**

Embarrassment and humiliation had begun to seep through my very core. Being upside down wasn't helping my situation at all. I could hear the whispers and the mock tones of the others all around me. I had to keep myself from crying out of anger and frustration. How could this be happening? This test hadn't seemed all that hard. Why was I having so much trouble? And of course, I had to open my mouth about killing Titans when I couldn't even manage to stay up straight.

 _Damn is,_ I thought. I had to get better. I wouldn't let it end like this. I would become a soldier in the Survey Corps. I had to. There was nothing I wanted more then that. I need to show them all what I was capable of. But it was already too late. Everyone had gone back to do their things, leaving me alone with my two best friends, Armin and Makasu.

"Maybe this is a sign, Erena. You should just quit. You'll only get yourself killed," Makasu told me as I attempted the test on my own time again.

"Maybe Makasu's right, Erena. Maybe this isn't-" Armin added before I cut him off.

"Both of you, shut up! I can do this! I _will_ do this! There's nothing you can say that will make me give up!" I yelled at them before dropping to the ground, hitting my poor forehead in the process. My words were bitten back at my epic fail. But still, I couldn't give up now. I made this my life's mission. No matter the obstacle, I will defeat it!

"Why can't you just let this go? What are you trying to prove? You will die out there," Makasu questioned me. His concern was becoming to be irritating. Because his concern also should how much he didn't believe in me. And that hurt a lot. I huffed and crossed my arms as I sat on the ground after Armin had let me down. I tried to not show my hurt. I heard Makasu sigh then his footsteps start walking away from me, "Fine."

I bit back my tears as I punched the earth beneath me once, relaxing my hand only to claw at the dirt as if I could hold to my emotions. Makasu had always been someone I looked up to. He always seemed strong. Why couldn't I prove myself to be strong too? I didn't want to feel so helpless. Especially now after I had made a vow to kill all the Titans. What was I doing wrong?

"Erena?" I heard Armin's voice. I could tell that he was talking as if he were walking on eggshells. He didn't want to upset me even more than I already was.

"Yeah?" I said without much emotion or care. It was the only way for me to deal with my unwanted feelings.

"Let's go eat. Maybe after we eat you'll be up for more practicing," I could tell that he was trying to cheer me up. I just gave him a nod before getting myself up and dusting off my clothes. "Er. Maybe we should go to the Med Bay first."

I turned my head to look at his worried eyes. He was staring at my forehead. No doubt he was stressing out about my injury. I rolled my eyes, "It's not that bad. But sure. Let's stop there before you panic over it."

He frowned, "That's not far. I just hate seeing you hurt. That's all." I let myself smile a little, appreciating his genuine words. He had always been there for me. He was like a worried brother. He smiled back at me before we made our way to get my head checked. Maybe I could ask some help from the others before the retest tomorrow morning.

3rd POV (Makasu's)

He watched on in the crowd of would be soldiers. He held his breath, waiting for the instructor to fail his friend. No. Erena had become more dear to him than any mere friend. She had become someone that he wanted to stay close to. He wanted to protect her from ever being hurt. But she was stubborn and reckless. This had been evident since they were kids but now it was different. She was marching in the path of certain death.

His fists tightened beside him as he thought about it. Why had she been so stubborn to walk down this path? He didn't want to see her get hurt. He didn't want to see her die. But there was nothing for him to do. He had tried to change her mind countless times. She only seemed to pull further away from him. What could he do to make her see that he only wanted what was best for her?

He let out a sigh, _All I could do was enlist with her._ The heavy feeling in his chest wouldn't disappear. Why was he feeling like this?

His mind snapped back into reality when he heard the crowd say disappointed words from all around him. He focused back in front of him and saw that Erena had once again failed the test. He couldn't up the tiny smirk and the feeling of relief swell up in his chest. Now she would be out of danger. However, his relief was cut short.

 _No_ , he frowned. He watched at the instructor asked another person to hand Erena their belt to try it again. His hands tightened their grip once again. His teeth clenched as he watched Erena smile and look at him with a look of triumph on her features as she passed the test. He knew that she was proud and was telling him that she wasn't going anywhere.

"She did it even when her gear was defective? Who is this girl?" he heard someone say. He felt a pang of anger and something else surface but let it go as quickly as it came. Erena was an amazing girl. He knew that very well. It shouldn't bother him that other people saw that as well. But why did it?

"Is it just me or is Erena being full of herself," Armin commented with a sigh. He was watching his closest friend grin like an idiot as she balanced herself of the apparatus.

Makasu shook his head, "No. She is telling us that she isn't leaving us. Not today." Not being able to bare it any longer he turned around to leave the field with a weight on his shoulders.

 _I guess there's nothing left I can do,_ he thought as he kept walking away. He had tried to discourage her. He had even sabotage her belt so that she would fail. But of course, the instructor had to have figured it out. At least no one knew that he had been the one to do so. He knew that if someone found out what he did and told Erena…

 _It was for her own good_ , he told himself. He couldn't lose more family. He wouldn't lose _her._ But is was unlike him to do such things. To others, he would seem like the silent, brooding type. Or even mysterious. But truth was, he didn't know how to deal with people. Erena was the only one he was trying to communicate with and understand. It was hard though. For Makasu, it was hard to say what he felt. All he could do is try to guide her and protect her in his own way.

He promised himself that he would do his best to become stronger. He needed to be able to protect her. That day, he vowed that he would slay any Titan that would get in his way of protecting his only family left.

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 **A/N: What did you think? I'd appreciate any feedback. I try to keep everyone in character but there will be some differences since two main characters are gender bend. Did you like the POV change? Thank you!**


	5. Chapter 5: Choices

**Chapter 5**

 **Choices**

The anticipation was starting to drive me wild. Everyday that went by meant that I was that much closer to reaching my goal. There was nothing I wanted more than to finally be able to choose which regiment I wanted to be in. I knew that Makasu was still very much against me being there but he had finally stopped trying to talk me out of it. It was as if he now understood that there was nothing he could do to stop me. I _was_ going to become stronger and kill all those fucking Titans. No one could stop me from reaching that goal.

I snapped back into reality as Reiner ran towards me with a mock dagger. I easily took advantage of his large size and threw him on the ground. It was true what they say, 'The bigger they are, the harder they fall'.

I took in a deep breath as I gave him my hand to get back up, "I don't understand these exercises. We shouldn't be training to fight humans. We should be training to kill Titans." Reiner was back on his feet telling about how it's all necessary because we don't know when these skills will be needed later on. I just didn't really care about fighting people. I wanted to kill all the monsters. This was still completely useless to me. But maybe he had a point.

He had placed my attention on one of the other female recruits. Lets just say his words had gotten me in trouble with her. She totally kicked my ass and that was when I wanted to learn her moves. She had a different fighting style than the others. It was exciting and new to me. Even if she had a terrible personality. She was still a good fighter. Her moves could come in handy some day. And she had been right. The others weren't honing their skills to fight. They were honing their skills to hide behind a wall like a bunch cowards.

XX

It was finally time to eat but of course all the useless chatter around me began to irritate me more and more. They were all talking about their skills and being an MP behind the wall. They made me sick at how stupid they sounded. Were they really that naive to think they would be safe there? The only option was to fight. It was the only way that guaranteed our safety. We had to kill all the damn Titans. Jean was the one that pissed me off the most out of all of them.

I couldn't keep myself quiet anymore as he was talking to Marco about staying behind the wall, "Listen to you guys." They turned their attention on me. "Interior. Five years ago, this used to be the interior."

I drank so of the water from my cup as Jean answered, "What's your point, little girl."

I tried to stay calm as I answered him, "Poor Jean. So misguided. And besides," I paused for effects before I looked at him, "I don't think your head will fit in the interior anyway." The others began to snicker around us.

"Very funny," he spat out, getting angry.

"Seems a little backwards to me. Fine tuning your Titan killing skills so that the brash stations you somewhere you won't see any," I went on. I really didn't care if it pissed him off. I needed to say these things.

"I'll pass at being good at being killed. It's better to play the system then to be something to be chowed on," he retorted.

That ticked me off, "You bastard!" I stood up ready to hit him.

He got up as well, "Bring it on, Princess!" He really knew how to get under my skin. I stepped closer to him, ignoring Armin's pleas to stop. I couldn't let this go. Not with a coward like him. There was no way. I had just grabbed on his shirt before Makasu had took my hand and placed it back to my side, telling us to stop. I looked down, slightly ashamed that I let my emotions get the better of me. But I was forcefully grabbed by the collar of my shirt, "YOU THINK YOU CAN JUDGE ME?!" My anger was starting to build back up again. "YOU PISS ME OFF, GIRL."

I was about to retort but everything around me slowed. I saw everyone looking at us. And that was when it all made sense. He had something to prove to them. Now that it finally clicked in my head, I had decided to deescalate the situation. I grabbed on his arm and flipped him onto his back on the group.

He sat himself up, "Damnit. What the hell was that, you brat?!"

"A little move I picked up this afternoon," I informed him. "While you were too busy with your thumb up your ass." I stopped for a second, looking down at him, "You honestly believe that the Military Police is your ticket to the good life? You're not a soldier," I narrowed my eyes at him, "You're a joke."

XX

"Nice speech," I heard Makasu say as we began to walk back to where we've been sleeping. "Try to not get in trouble next time."

I rolled my eyes, "I didn't get into trouble."

"Because Makasu lied for you," Armin added from the other side of me. He sighed, "Honestly, Erena. Your temper will get you into trouble one day."

I shrugged, "Well I wasn't going to let that coward off like that. Plus, it pisses me off that he keeps calling 'princess'."

"You are only letting him win if you keep letting him piss you off like that," Armin informed me.

"Yeah, yeah. Get off my back, will ya?" I looked at Makasu. "I didn't ask you to butt in anyways. I can take care of myself."

He looked back down at me, "Whether you can take care of yourself or not. I made your mother a promise. I plan on keeping it."

It made it worse. Knowing that he was only looking out for me because my mother had made him promise. There was a tiny part of me that wanted him to be there for me because he just simply wanted to. But another side of me wanted him to leave. He never wanted to be a soldier. He never wanted to be here. He only came because of that stupid promise. I wouldn't forgive myself if something happened to him because he couldn't break it. And I even dragged Armin into it.

Even though, all I wanted was to kill the Titans. I still thought about my friends. I stopped myself from thinking anymore. I wasn't all selfish. They had made their choices. And I had made mine. I had a mission that I had to complete no matter what. I wasn't going to let us live in fear behind walls anymore. Not like cattle ready to be slaughtered.

"Whatever. Tomorrow, we graduate," I let myself smile at my accomplishment this far.

"Are you still going to go for the Scouts?" Armin asked.

"Yeah. There's no other place I'd rather be." The Titans didn't know what was coming to them. I was ready.


	6. Chapter 6 : Kill Them All

**A/N: Hey Everyone. I know, I know. I'm the worse. It took me so long to update and I am very sorry. I just keep getting sick. But anyways. I haven't abandoned this story or my DL one. So don't be worried about that! I hope you all enjoy this new chapter! :)**

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 **Chapter 6**

 **Kill Them All**

Agony. Shearing, throbbing agony. That was all I could feel as I waited for death. I had just witnessed so many of my friend, Thomas, die right before my very eyes. The anger that I had felt towards the very monsters that took their life had driven me into insane rage. The rage pushed me to my limits and narrowed my focus to one thing, to kill them all. I was so stuck in my rage that had made a dangerous mistake that had cost me two limbs.

 _As I laid there bleeding on the rooftop, with a missing left leg. I knew that this was wrong. It was all wrong. This wasn't how this was suppose to end. Was Makasu going to save me like he always did? No. I was done for. I clenched my teeth together, thinking about how pathetic I actually was. I couldn't even protect my comrades in battle. How useless could I be? I heard the screams of my squad as each one were eating alive and there was nothing I could do._

" _Erena!" I heard a voice call out to me. I recognized that voice._ Armin. _I thought back to when we were kids. We had been so interested in the outside world, the world beyond the walls. I remembered that Armin was so interested that he had gotten his hands on a book that was forbidden. I remembered when he talked about a thing called the 'sea'. He looked so excited to see the outside world with his own eyes._

" _Ahhh!" I heard his screams in the distance. My eyes came back into focus and watched in horror and hatred as a Titan held onto my best friend, about to devour him whole. I didn't know where I had gotten the strength to get up and pull him out of the mouth of the Titan, but I had._

" _I can't die here," I told myself. I wanted to see the outside world with him and Makasu one day. I wasn't going to die here. "Armin," I looked him in the eye as he sat, safe on the rooftop, "We will see the outside world, together." I reached out my hand as I spoke to him._

" _Erena! Hurry!" he said, but it was already too late. My strength had left me and the Titan snapped his jaw shut on my arm. I had managed to save my friend but ended up getting devoured in his place._

It wasn't suppose to be this way. We had trained so hard and gotten stronger. It was all to destroy the existence of Titans. But was that hard work all for nothing? I was in the belly of one, eyes wide from seeing so many of my comrades dead there. Was this how I was going to die too? Did they have to take everything from us? Our lives? Our dreams? No. I wasn't going to let them take anymore. I wouldn't let them win. I had to remember the words I spoke to my comrades after graduation. I was going to kill them all. "I am going to kill you all myself!" I yelled within it's massive body. My anger and resolve changed me but I didn't know how it had changed me but that was the only thing that kept going through my mind. It was my purpose as I let myself slip into instinct and hatred for the Titans.

XXX

"I will kill them all," I repeated like my sacred mantra. Hearing my own voice speak out loud caused me to come back to my senses.

"Erena," I heard a familiar voice from beside me. I felt an arm around my shoulder, holding my upper body up.

I looked up to see my best friend, alive and well, "Armin?" I was relieved to see him again. But something about me felt different and I was confused.

"Erena," I heard Makasu's voice from a few feet away. That was when I noticed all the soldiers around us. Why were they surrounding us like that? What was going on?

"Erena, can you move?" Armin asked me. "Can you understand what I am saying? Tell them everything you know. I'm sure that they will understand."

His words didn't make any sense to me. What was I supposed to tell them? Before I could speak I heard one of the soldiers mention something about me devouring them. It confused me even further. Why would I devour them? How could I? The thought disgusted me. But something in the way they looked at me made me feel like they were the ones disgusted with me. Their eyes held anger, fear, disgusted and so much more. Their blades looked like they were ready to strike us at any second. Had I done something? I couldn't remember anything. My memories were so foggy.

"Trainees Yeager, Ackerman and Arlert. What you are doing is an act of treason," one of them said to us. "We may decide to kill you on the spot." My eyes widened at his words. Were they really going to kill us? What did we do that was an act of treason? Could someone explain this to me? What was going on? Questions kept coming to my mind. I couldn't understand what was going on. Why were they turning against us? "If you attempt to lie to us, or make a single move, we will fire a HE projectile at you at once. We will not hesitate!" _What?_ "Answer me at once." He took a slight pause as he looked directly at me, "Are you a human or a Titan?" _What kind of question is that? Why does he keep looking at me like that?_ I thought. They were looking at me as if I were a monster. Was that really what they that I was?

"I- I don't understand the question!" I yelled, still unsure as to what was going on. I was getting fed up at how they were treating me. I was not a monster!

"She's pretending to know nothing?" he let out. "Monster! Try that again and I will blow you to pieces. It will only to a second. You won't be able to reveal your true form on time!"

"True form?" What was he talking about?

"Plenty of people saw you," he kept going. "As you emerged from a Titan!" _No…_ "Humanity has permitted a creature like you to infiltrate Wall Rose! Even if you are Trainees given to us by the King, the safest choice is to eliminate you right away!" I noticed Makasu's hands tighten by his side as the man before us kept threatening to kill me and whoever tried to protect me. I was once again being protected by him. Only this time, the army was against me and calling me a monster. "My thinking is correct! The Armoured Titan could appear at moment. Right now, humanity faces the risk of extinction. Do you understand?" He kept threatening to kill us because they were wasting time and troops. Makasu stepped up and basically told them that they would have to go through him to get to me.

"Makasu, Armin. What is going on?" I asked them, still very unsure as to what was really going on here. They both ignored me as Armin tried to talk Makasu out of fighting the troops.

"I won't let anyone kill Erena," Makasu said as he readied himself for the worse. Was he really going to fight them to protect me? These were our comrades. Weren't they? As everyone fought over what to do, I tried to remember how I had gotten there. My mind was still unclear with the details. What had happened? And was I the only one that didn't think I was a Titan? I tried to move but my exhausted body refused to. What could I do? My friends were in trouble because of me. I had to do something. But if I said anything, they would kill us. Why did they think I was a Titan? Wasn't all that before just a nightmare?

I looked down at my left arm where my shirt had been ripped. My eyes narrowed as I remembered being devoured by the Titan. Did that really mean I was one? The man asked me again what I was and I answered I was human. I watched my friends infront of me and I wanted nothing more than to protect them. But the man began to raise his arm up to signal to fire at us.

"Erena!" Makasu ran towards me, leaving his blades behind on the ground. "We are going up." As he picked me up over his shoulder, it was then that I remembered. I remembered little bits of my memory I had forgotten. I knew what to do now. I got off Makasu's shoulder and dragged him towards Armin. I needed to protect them from the blast. As I reached Armin and grabbed on to him, I bit down on my thumb. It didn't matter what would happen to me as long as they would survive.


	7. Pet Titan

**A/N: Hey everyone. Sorry it took so long and that it's short. Having a bit of trouble with how I want to approach things. Hope you enjoy!**

 **Chapter 7**

 **Pet Titan**

Many different thoughts came to mind as I sat on my knees, chained up to a metal pool in front of many terrified eyes. I couldn't deny the fact that I was pissed off that they still saw me as a threat after plugging up the damn hole. It wasn't as if I knew why or how I could change into a Titan. I had never asked for this fucked up thing to happen to me. I now had only two options before me. For them to see me as a threat or a useful tool that can help them in winning the war against the titans. I could die for being the monster they see before them, or be a useful monster that they can exploit for their own benefit. I was leaning more towards the later for the mere fact that I didn't see myself as the threat. I was still very motivated on wiping all the titans from existence.

It was difficult in the sense that at first I had no control over my titan form. I had been lost in a dream where my parents were still alive and Makasu was there with my mother with a smile on each of their faces. It had been a happy time in my own mind, where the peace existed. But if it wasn't for Armin I would have let everyone down. He had reached me and raised me up from the lie I had been stuck in and was able to get me to fill the hole with the help of everyone who protected me as I moved the builder over. It hadn't been an easy task.

It was then that I had realized that no matter how much I missed the days before the monsters broke through, I still had to continue to fight. It was meeting him for the first time, I realized that he saw my usefulness. Captain Levi from the Scout Regime was everything I had expected, though I didn't think he would have went that far to prove a point to the terrified people gathered around me. No matter what I had said to them, they still were afraid of me. I should have remained quiet but I just let it all out. I had just finished telling them to let me shoulder it all but they had been ready to fire on me. That was when the first kick to my face was felt. I was pretty sure I had lost a tooth. But that didn't matter as my whole body began to feel new kinds of pain as Captain Levi kept on kicking me. My vision and my mind wavered in and out as he kept at it. I could barely register what was being said. Was no one going to stop him from beating on a girl so mercilessly? But I guess this what I asked for.

For so long I had wanted others to see me as an equal and not just a weak girl who couldn't defend herself and had to hide being her adoptive brother. And today, I got my wish. No one saw me as a girl on this day. All they could see was the thing I had somehow become. My gender or sex didn't matter in the slightest. I had lost the prejudice of being a weak girl to gaining the prejudice of being a monster in disguise. I didn't know which one a prefered more but the pain coursing through my body told me that I wanted to be seen as a girl again. Why had this happened to me.

I suppressed as many of my screams as I could as he kept on beating on me. I could taste the blood in my mouth as my body shivered. Was this my new reality now? To be dissected and beaten down?

 _I'm not human._

 _Not in there eyes._

 _Not anymore._

My mind began to drift even further. Would I ever have the chance to fulfill my wish, my mission of destroy every fucking titan? Did that mean me?

 _I'm not human anymore._

 _I'm a monster._

But what did that mean? Had I become the thing I sworn to hate?

I heard the echoes of the voices around me as my body was numb from all the pain. I had to stop thinking this way. I had to remember what I had said to Captain Levi.

 _That's right._

I had to remember that I had told him that I wanted to slaughter every single titan and the way he responded. He knew what he was doing. This pain wasn't for nothing and I could take a hit.

 _I'm not a monster._

 _I will kill the monsters._

 _And now I have a means to do it._

Captain Levi was just ensuring that they would see that he had things under control. He had me under control. If necessary he could kill me. But it wouldn't come to that. There was no way I would turn into one of those things that eat people. No way in hell. I had faith that everything would turn out alright. And I was right. For the time being at least.

I hadn't planned on being someone's pet titan, but what else could I do?


End file.
